8

Dec

I Know We’re ‘Cool’

Posted by TallFreak  Published in Personal

Yesterday I went to my ex-boyfriend’s new boyfriend’s birthday dinner.  My ex and I dated for 4 years and we are still friends, which is something I’m very proud and grateful for.  You don’t see that too often in the gay community.  I had a great time at the dinner and I’m glad to see that they are doing well.  Jeff, I hope you had a great birthday!  Kevin, I’m glad to know you are happy and thanks for being a great friend!  Love you guys!

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Steve said in December 8th, 2007 at 2:13 pm

Well, I am glad to say that I am also still friends with my ex boyfriends.

I am very rational in these things. If you were friends and lovers beforehand, why not stick with the friendship when the romance falls away? I know lot of people think otherwise, but that’s the way I see it.

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Murali said in December 9th, 2007 at 6:49 am

YEs. What is wrong in continuing with the friendship?

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donna in TEXAS said in December 9th, 2007 at 3:31 pm

you see it more common in the lesbian side but it says a lot about you that you can be friends. I mean unless the person was toxic and you needed to be away why not be friends. I find if people can’t be friend then they arent over the person and haven’t moved on…

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Heath said in December 10th, 2007 at 9:45 am

That is rare, though it shouldn’t be.

One of the guys that I dated years ago - very negative breakup. Saw him again after about 10 years, and we got along just fine. We won’t hang out or anything (don’t live anywhere near each other), but we see each other every year at a conference and it’s fine.

As for two other guys I dated…I think I talk to them maybe 2-3 times a year at most. They just aren’t part of my circle of friends any more.

One person, I haven’t talked to since, and likely won’t. Very negative breakup, because I did the breaking up and he couldn’t accept it - sorry, I don’t fall in love in less than 3 months.

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John said in December 11th, 2007 at 6:50 am

It is sad you don’t see that so often. Me I usually try to keep in contact with an ex, but of course it’s a two-way street. With many of the men I’ve dated we just fall out of contact eventually. Only a handful are still very close. One guy I think it was way too early for him, and he couldn’t handle it. We went on our first date, he stayed over (ahem), and the next day he came out to his parents. Yikes! What a way to come out!!! I did like him and he was a nice guy (even got me into aerobic kickboxing for a short period of time - I lost 20 lbs), but I think we moved too fast. He moved to Frisco a few months later for work. I tried to keep in touch, but he didn’t. I may be overcompensating timewise now - I tend to take things waaaaaay slow.

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tallfreak said in December 11th, 2007 at 8:51 am

Thanks for sharing your stories guys!

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Hermosa Kango said in December 12th, 2007 at 4:41 pm

I think it’s so great that you and your ex are still friends. It IS rare in the gay community . . . and it’s completely non-existent in my life. None of my exes will even speak to me! Wah!

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Wellness Bad Zell said in January 12th, 2008 at 1:38 am

Interesting to hear such a thing. I know this is not so often in this community. Please share your further experiences.

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Travis said in April 26th, 2008 at 2:14 am

Glad to hear that everything went well. Keep ya head up and I wish you luck on your future relationships.

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pathologic said in May 29th, 2008 at 2:43 pm

I’m skeptical of course, but what the hell, let’s give it a try.

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GPS Guy said in June 11th, 2008 at 3:17 pm

I’m really glad you are this cool about it. Myself i have a hard time seeing any of my ex:(

BR,
John

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Laser said in July 25th, 2008 at 7:58 am

Glad you guys are ok as friends. When out of a relationship the friendship can actually grow in another aspect.

/Ron

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