Me and Sarah Silverman

Last night Hiram, Amanda, Nick, and I drove 5 hours to Tallahassee, FL to see Sarah Silverman at FSU. We had forgotten about the hour change in Tallahassee so when we arrived we only had a few minutes to get ready and go to the arena. Upon arriving we didn’t realize this was going to be a huge pep rally for FSU’s homecoming weekend. I think I was the oldest person there. Just kidding, that was Amanda. lol The FSU “Pow Wow” was almost as awesome as the stand-up. They had cheerleaders and dancers doing their “Bring it On” routines which totally rocked! They even had a FSU “flying circus” doing the most amazing stunts. I really should have gone to FSU. They had the coolest entertainment acts, special effects and video editing I have ever seen produced by a school. The “Pow Wow” ended with FSU’s famous coach Bobby Bowden giving his support to the FSU crowd.

Doug Benson opened the comedy act. He was hilarious! You may remember him from VH1’s “Best Week Ever” or TV’s “Last Comic Standing.” He made a lot of pot jokes but they were pretty funny. I loved how he said he only had sex in months which ended in “-bruary” this year. LOL “And not ‘Novembruary’ as some of you guys might be thinking.”

Then it was Sarah’s turn to take the stage. It was so cool to see her in real-life and not on the screen. She was beautiful as usual in her tom-boyish way. I was excited to hear she had some new material. One of her new jokes was about when she was a little girl and used to shower with her mom. Her mom’s showerhead would come from the wall but Sarah’s showerhead would come from the water dripping down her mom and splashing off her thick, curly bush. lol I won’t ruin the other jokes for you though. She also sang a few songs. When she was singing “I Love You More” (from “Jesus is Magic”) she saw me singing along with her at “I love you more than the white stuff in a zit” and she said outloud “Ohh that’s so sweet!” while smiling at me! A lot of guys were yelling at her saying “Take your top off!” during her jokes. She called one guy out and said “Is that all you can come up with?” “Ok, I’ll take off my top once FSU wins a game” and the whole crowd went crazy - some laughing, some shooting her the bird. She said that guy was retarded but that she loved every one else and she would take off her top later.

Once she left the stage my friends and I went backstage. We ran into some asshole security guards that said there was no list and that Sarah had already left the arena. I knew they were lying to me. “But I make her webpage and she really wants to meet me” I said. That didn’t phase them. I finally found the main crew guy and he remembered hearing about me and gave us some backstage passes. We were led to the back and saw Sarah and Doug Benson right away. She came to me running with open arms to hug me. She thanked me for making the webpage and was telling Doug and some other people about it and that I do such a great job for her. She asked if I was sitting in the center aisle because she remembered me singing along with her. I was like “Yes that was me!” She also said that I was “tall and handsome.” It was all too surreal for me. I remember introducing her to my friends and getting my picture taken with her. lol I asked her if she would sign some photos for me and she was like “Sure. Anything for you!” I should have brought more. When she found out that Nick was my boyfriend she got excited and gave him a big hug. Amanda jokingly told her that Hiram was Mexican (he’s really Puerto Rican) referring to one of Sarah’s Mexican jokes. Sarah thought the name Hiram sounded Jewish and signed his photo saying “You’ll always be Jewish to me.” LOL She drew on mine pointing to her tits writing “Check these out.” The coolest part was that she remembered my nickname “Chrizzle” and wrote it down without me even mentioning it. I was like “You remembered my nickname!” There were a few other people waiting to see her so I wrapped it up saying “So good to finally meet you. Tell Jimmy I said hello. I know he has a lot of jet lag right now.” (He’s been flying back and forth doing his show and filling in for Regis this week.) She talked about that for a little bit and then I left saying “Have fun in FL!” She gave me one of those cutsie “ahh thanks for remembering” looks. She’s on-tour in FL all weekend. So if you live in the Orlando or Miami area - go see her!

I was so glad to finally be able to meet her. She was very sweet and appreciative. I think she gave me 3 or 4 hugs in total. lol I’m kinda glad it’s over because I was anxious about it all week. I’m glad I have photos and autographs to keep the memory alive. And who knows, maybe I’ll be able to meet her again sometime!